…or something like that.

I just had an awesome workout. I’m either stronger or I just wasn’t pushing enough last week. I may not have been. I’ve never “power” lifted before.  Today I was making faces and grunting like the big boys!

Ultimate Diet 2.0 - Week 2, Day5

Weight 134.5
kCals:  1968
Carbs: 199.5 grams.
Total for carb up: 599.5 - 12g per kg/lbm

Day 6 Workout:

DL:  3×5x175
Flat DB Fly: 2×6x70, 1×6x80

BB Row: 2×5x95, 1×6x95 - Was still in DL mode. Forgot to do 6 reps first 2 sets.
Incline DB Press: 2×6x35, 1×6x135 (Machine). Couldn’t lift the 40s to start the third set.

Leg Press: 1×6x300, 340, 360

Low Row: 3×6x9, 1×6x10
Calf Raise: 1×6x210, 2×6x220, 1×6x225

Glute-Ham Raise (!!): 2×4, 2×3, 1×2. YES! I did this. I didn’t go below parrallel to the floor but, hey, last week I couldn’t do one from even above parallel.
DB MP: 3×6x60

Assisted Wide Grip Lat Pull: 1×6x10, 2×6x8
Chins: 2×3, 1×3.5, 1×4

Tricep Dip, 4×4. And yes, these were unassisted. I totally rock.

My hands are killing me. I don’t wear gloves for deads or chins. They seem to make it harder. I use ‘em for low row and DBs because those handles are sharp and kill me. Still I have callouses like I had after playing guitar for 10 years. Callouses are NOT for girls! My gloves suck. I need to get real ones. Or something. My hands hurt more than anything else.

Now I’m sleepy. I need to eat though.

Oh and I kinda half dropped the bar on myself during the decent on my last DL. OK well, I used my quad to lower the weight because if I hadn’t the bar woulda come crashing down and I would have gotten yelled at. Hit right above my knee. The one with the tendinitis. Last week I had bruises up and down my shins. I think I need knee pads or something. That’s happened before.  I had a bruise in the same spot a few weeks back.  A huge ugly bruise. This will be the same no doubt. I can tell because it hurts. Bad. I actually almost left the gym to go buy an ice pack after I did it, it hurt that much.

Whoo hooo I get to eat  caramel truffle brownie sundae tonight!

Weight: 136
kCals: 1302
Carbs: 19% (61.5g)
Workout: Ab circuit, 20m treadmill, 40m Arc

Hanging leg raises: 3×10 - These are getting too easy. Not sure if I’m working the abs correctly. I start from a dead stop, hanging, then lift knees to chest.

Woodchop: 1×12x3 plate. My form was sucking and I couldn’t seem to find the groove, so I stopped.

Jack knife: 3 x 12

Lateral Raise: 2 x 12 x 25

Plank on Ball: 2 x 2 min.

Plank w/static leg raise: 1 x 2 min.

uhm……

Week 2, Day 1
Weight: 139.5
kcals: 1536
Carbs: 94.37g (going for 75g. oops) So, that’s like 25% carb.
Depletion workout: lower body- 90+ minutes, cardio - 60 minutes

Day 2
Weight: 138
kcals: 1387
Carbs: 69.9g - 20%
Depletion workout: upper body - 90+ minutes, cardio - 40 minutes - Wanted to 60. OK not wanted really but woulda had I not had cramps/bloating/gas. ugh. It went something like this in my head which was battling me the entire time:

“I’m tired. I’m hungry. I’m in pain. I have to pee. So what if I just went 3 times during weights. 40s good. Get the fuck off the Arc. If you don’t I will take you out at the knees.”

Day 3
Weight:

139.5 (!!!!)(WTF???!!!?)

The scale is not my friend today or I just get fat on low cal/low carb.

Not giving up yet up jeez that number really threw me. Could be the “irregular” f-ing thing again or TOM I guess. I really wish I had a clue.

It’s been 3 days since things have moved.  I don’t know what the issue is. I get 20-30g fiber low cal. 30-40g on typical days. Could be dehydration maybe? I do suck at water. I drink it but generally only get 60 oz on average.

So anyway. I wasn’t even hungry yesterday. Only time I get really hungry is in the morning and during and after workouts.  Hunger pangs (why isn’t it pains? It does hurt after all!) during depletetion workouts make me a bit queezy.

I was aiming for 1500 kcals yesterday but was bloated after dinner and not into whey before bed.  Too much salad I guess! I love me some salad. I gotta check the sodium on the dressing. It’s no fat, no carb, 5 cals per 2tblsp,  but so I guess there has to be something giving it flavor. Mostly it’s just vinegar though. I like me some vinegar. Anything with tons of flavor like that makes me not hungry.

I gotta say, those depletion workouts are not fun anymore. I liked ‘em last week. I walked into the gym yesterday and wanted to turn around and leave.  Maybe ’cause I knew I was gonna be there for 2-3 hours. That’s the first time I’ve felt like that.

Just the day before, as he was leaving, my Mr. Perfect, Mr. Walking Pheromone, grabbed my hand and told me not to stay too long. He was touching me!! He was touching me with the very manly hand attached to those very manly vascular forearms I couldn’t stand to look at just 10 minutes earlier.

I melted. And then I stammered. The I blurted out whilst slurring like a drunk, “But I like it here. I like it better when you’re here. Touching me. Please don’t stop touching me. Ever!” OK, no I didn’t say that. But I thought it. Yes I did, uh huh. Hey, he was touching me, what else was I gonna think?

Alrighty. I’m feeling a bit better today. Weight is back to where it was before I started Ultimate Diet 2.0.  Thigh and calf are +.25″, belly (girth around naval where all my abdominal fat hangs because of the excess loose skin that doesn’t hold things where they should be hence the tummy tuck!) is up .25″ as well. Caliper measurement is back to where it started, perhaps even maybe down a bit. So, considering the following:

1. PMS or TOM is here. Gotta be because I’ve been famished for the past two days despite having eaten over maintenance on Day 6). PMS always gives me insatiable hunger. Plus I was a miserable bitch yesterday until I did cardio. That’s always a “tell” as they say in poker.

2. Navy formula (what I use to calc bf%) are all down, giving me a fat loss of .8 and a LBM gain of .8 lbs.

3. Here’s the key part: After 1 week of Ultimate Diet 2.0 bf% is down .6% to 19.2% - where it was when I started week 2 of pre UD 2.0 maintenance (which ended up being a bit over maintenance!).

So, it would appear that I did not do as much damage as my (as is all too typical when the scale taunts me) hysteria yesterday led me to believe.

I woke up today thinking I wouldn’t continue UD 2.0. Now I think I may see if I can tweak a bit. I really don’t think the super low cal thing works well for me. I think I will try upping the cals but maybe adding some more light cardio work. Cardio does wonder for my head.

Yesterdays workout:

20 min Arc, 10 min treadmill (and my knees don’t hurt STILL!)
Hanging Leg Raise 3×10
Horizontal Woodchop 2×12x2 plate
Lateral Extension 1×12x25
Planks on Ball 2×120, 1×90

I slept at least 8 hours last night.

I woke up tired.

Low carb sucks.

I guess the only plus is that I’m not all that hungry. At least I’m not as hungry as I thought I’d be. I usually do 1700-1900 kcals. Ultimate Diet 2.0 has me doing 1200.

I’m really worried that I’m not getting in enough depletion during these workouts. I just can’t seem to match weight with reps and time under tension on some stuff. If I go lighter I get no burn. Heavier I fail. I dunno.

Did cardio this morning. I didn’t think I’d feel like doing it after today’s lower body workout. I actually probably could have gotten through it. I was just kinda bitchy and cranky so I’m glad I did it this morning. Then again, now I’m sitting here at 6:30 and have only like 300 calories left for the day. I was hungry by the time I went to bed last night, which was about an hour after I ate.

Nights suck for me. I just want to go to sleep but I can’t because: A) it’s too early and B) my daughter is coming home from college tonight. And that’s another thing!! She is an eater. Eating, eating, all the time. And she never shuts up. She’s gonna stress me I just know it. I talked to her earlier today and she’s like, “Let’s do something tonight, I wanna go to the movies.” Sure, she’s gonna get home maybe 8 or 9pm, we have to unload all her crap and then go out? I WOKE UP TIRED!! I just want to sleep!!!!! Not to mention the fact that I have no money or debit card and the movies cost like 8 gazillion dollars AND they have that stinking popcorn I hate HATE HATE saying no to! AND I’M HUNGRY!!

Bah. First thing I’m eating Friday night is M&Ms. I’ve already decided. No, second thing. First thing will be my pwo shake. They’ve got one of those candy machines in my “gym”, candy machine in the gym? hence the quotes, and I have to look at the M&Ms in it every time I leave the gym, when I’m starving, and can’t have my pwo carbs. I swear I only workout so that I can have my crack dextrose/malto/whey afterwards. I love that stuff. LOVE it. I put it in the blender and it gets all foamy and thick, almost like a milkshake but better than a milkshake.

I’m too tired to do a workout log. I need to do more calf sets and I should be good, at least #of set wise. Who knows if I worked hard enough. Yeah, I got dizzy, especially during DLs. I dunno what made me think that would be a good idea but I did ‘em. 4 sets @ 95lbs.

Well, at least my knees don’t hurt. At all. It’s amazing. I didn’t do lunges as that’s when I first felt the pain. I may try them next week. I couldn’t do step ups. Gym was too crowded today. Couldn’t do back extension either, again couldn’t get near it. I’m really tired of the crowds.

And, I’m so sick of the walking pheromone and his hot/cold crap. I dunno what that’s about. He’s either super shy or doesn’t think I like him, maybe both. I’m shy too, so grrr I dunno how to do this. I dunno. I dunno. I’m about ready to just tell him to ask me out or something. This is getting INCREDIBLY frustrating. And every once in a while he won’t show up for a week. I start thinking I missed my chance to, I dunno, tell him I love him and want to marry him?, OK just that I want him, badly.

Kid just called. They are out to eat. She’s having chicken parm. I whine, bitch, and moan. She says, “I’ll bring some home for you!”

Oh great, and there’s the damn ice cream truck with it’s loud obnoxious music.

Or food even.

OK Day 1 of Ultimate Diet 2.0. I was doing great until I worked out. I ran out of steam pretty quickly. Like uhm halfway through the first super set. I was shocked. Especially after the kick my ass killer workout I pumped out yesterday.

UD 2.0 workout requires 10-12 sets per body part. 15- 20ish reps per set. I did upper body today. Tomorrow is lower.

I had issues. A set is supposed to take 45-60 seconds. Well, for like bent over row, I used 20lb DBs first set. I’ve been using the 40s for 6 reps. So I figured 20 should do it. Not sure if they were too heavy or too light. I did 20 reps first set and only took me maybe 30 seconds. Did 25 the second but that was almost failure. By the fourth set I had to drop to 15s and still I couldn’t get the set to take more than 40 sec. So, I dunno. I had similar issues on other exercises. Maybe I’m supposed to drop set? If I do this again next week I’ll try that maybe.

Don’t think I got in enough chest work. I tried to doing push ups very last just to get in a couple more sets. Couldn’t do it. First set I got maybe 10 if that. Second I used the bench and got 7 on an incline. I’ll see if I can do a couple tomorrow.

I did chin & pull up negs to start. Eeked out 1.5 close grip chins. Depletion workout took over an hour. Then I did 30 on the Arc. I can’t believe I actually did the Arc. I was ready to fall asleep during my last couple of sets. I didn’t get nauseous during the workout. I did get a little dizzy early on so I eased up and took some longer rests - like longer than the 10 secs I’ve been doing!!

I’m totally spent now. First thing I wanted to do when I got home was inhale some sugar. I’m drinking coffee now - with light cream even(!) so as to avoid those pesky milk carbs! I’m pretty sure Dunkin Donuts coffee is God’s gift to humankind.

OMG LOL I just checked my kcals for today, I’m at 845 kcals and 47 grams of carbs. I get 60!! I might have to go get McDs or sumthin. Jeez!!

I thought the low cal was gonna be tough. Aside from post workout it really has been almost too easy. I shouldn’t say that. I’ll probably be famished tomorrow. Oh wait, I’m famished now!! I’m gonna eat and crash.

…….and since I just finished what is probably the hardest workout I’ve ever done, I’m not even going to try and flex my brain to come up with a decent title for this post. And anyway, it’s just a log so who cares.

Did a full body today. It’s Sunday, the gym would be empty, I can’t do cardio, and so I wanted something to get the heart rate up. It worked.

A crap load of stretching and some activation stuff - Peterson Step Ups, Hip abduction static and dynamic, glute-ham raise, no not like Mr. Norton’s YouTube, the standing cable kickback things. Though I did try the real thing today. No, I can’t do ‘em. Feels like my hams are gonna rip outta my knee. They probably would if I forced it. So, I’m either doing it wrong or I just don’t have the strength. Probably both.

Did this GBC style. 6 exercises per super set, alternating upper & lower. 10 sec rests between exercises. 2 minute rest between super sets. I was in the gym 2.25 hours. I’m not sure how long the actual workout took, but it was at least 60 minutes and I’m not sure why given the short rests. Did take me some time to unload all the plates from Set 1. I dunno.

Set 1
SLDL - 3×6x135
Low Row - 3×6x8.5 plate
Leg Press - 3×12x180 - coulda gone higher. Probably better that I didn’t though.
Push Up feet on bench - 3×12
Step Up - 2×25x40, 1×25x30.
DB Standing Military Press 1×25x20, 2×25x30

Set 2
Back Ext - 3×6x50
DB Bent Row - 3×6x80 - This really is too heavy but I’m an idiot
DB Squat - 3×12x60
Incline DB Press - 3×12x60
Marching Bridge - 3×25
Bent DB Fly - 3×25x5

Coupla things - My knees did not hurt at all. I felt some odd sensation during step ups but it was in a different location. It didn’t hurt. Felt more like just fatigue or a tightening above the knee. Dunno what that’s about. I didn’t feel the tendinitis pain in the shin though. I’m thinking it’s because I’ve stayed off the Arc since Thursday or Friday.

I had zippo zero water pre workout and wow was I feeling it. That’s why I hadda drop the weight on the last set of step ups. The prior set left me nearly heaving and dry mouthed. Not good.

Those bent over DB flys are still tough to get through by the third set, BUT not nearly as tough as when I started, what 3 workouts ago? Nice!

I guess that’s it. Abs tomorrow. Was gonna do some cardio too but I think I’ll save my knees for UD 2.0 depletion - if I do it at all. I’m hesitating now. I only have 3 weeks, not sure if it’s worth the suffering to lose just a couple pounds. Maybe my focus should just be rehabbing the knee, fixing the imbalances, and maybe improve upper body strength. I forgot to do my chins & pull ups today.

Oh, wait, I already have.

I always say the older I get the dumber I get. I swear ya lose half your brain cells with each pregnancy. So, that would make me, uhm, braindead?

I have the last two workouts scribbled on a ripped up piece of paper. So, I’m really just here to get them to “hard copy.” How times have changed! Hard copy used to be paper. For me it’s a hard drive. Preferably not one I can mess up.

I need a secretary to keep me organized. Earlier this week I lost a $300 check. Add that to the money my daughter took accidentally last week, and that leaves me scrambling big time to cover the mortgage payment being automatically deducted on the 1st.

THEN, because I need more money issues aggravation, yesterday I go to the ATM and take out $20. Head to Dunkin’ for my coffee. I’m getting ready to go food shopping. Need coffee. Get coffee. Stop at Target first. I need workout clothes. And hairspray. And, and, and….I always end up with armfuls of stuff every time I go into a store for one or two things.

So, I go to pay. I have no debit card!!?? HUH? Where’s my card? I JUST USED IT!!!!!!!!!! (This is the story of my life. I just used something therefore it must get lost.) This is the second time I’ve lost my debit card in the past 2 or 3 months.

OK fine, it must be in the car? Nope.

Uhm, in the ATM? I go to the bank, (thankfully it’s still early and bank is open - it’s Saturday!! - and I withdraw cash), nope, didn’t leave the card in the machine either. OK fine. Go over to Dunkin, check around on the ground, ask inside. Nope. No debit card.

So, now I have a V8 on empty, and about $12 cash after going food shopping. I gotta quit this eating thing. I can’t afford it. EAS whey was 13.99 a month ago. Now it’s 18.99. I didn’t buy it. Used to be it was cheaper for me offline. And more convenient. OK enough bitching and moaning, here’s the workout:

Friday May whatever…2nd???

Glute activation stuff

GBC Set A
SLDL (because I forgot what my previous weight was because I don’t have a secretary to keep me sane and organized) 1×6x105, 1×6x125, 1×6x145.
Leg Press - 2×12x160, 1×12x180
Step Up - 1×25xBW, 1×25x20, 1×25x30 - still too light, though 40 might be too much.

GBC Set B
Back Ext - 1×6x40, 2×6x50
Lying Hip Abduction - thought I’d try these for VMO but didn’t work out so well. I did with 20lb dumbbell first but it was more of a workout staying balanced. Then I did them on a stability ball with no weight. Still I’m not getting the lactic burn with just 12 reps, so these are gone.
Marching Bridge - 2×25xBW. Wow, I likey these.

I have nothing to say. Yet. If I sit here long enough I’m sure I’ll think of something to complain about.

Wednesday, 4/31 - Back/Chest/Shoulders

Chin & Pull Up negatives. 3×8ish seconds. God they hurt. Couldn’t manage a chin. I think because last time I was using the smith bar and so I had to bend my knees. I think that’s why it was easier. Dunno. I’ll try it on the smith next time and see what happens.

GBC Sets:

Set A
BB Row - 3×6x85
Inline DB Press - 2×12x60, 1×11x60. Damnit!
Shoulder Press Machine (beause there were only 5lb DBs or 30s. I have no idea where the rest of the DBs were I wanted the 15s.) - 1×25x25, 1×20x30 (ouch), 1×7x25. Shoulda kept it at 25lbs no doubt.

Set B
Low Row - 3×6x8.5
Push Up (feet on bench) 3×12
Bent over DB Fly - 3×25x5. These kill me. I likey. I must be a sadist. I seriously can not wait for the UD 2.0 depletion workouts. I love getting my butt kicked. Makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something.

OK then I did some other stuff. What? Oh -

Dips - 2×10x12 plate. Whatever that is. I forget. I should know since there is a chart right there on the machine. Who cares? I stuck the pin in the 12 plate and that’s all I need to know.

Pec Dec - 3×12x45. I need to go 5 heavier on these. Somebody remind me. Man. I gotta put this stuff in a book don’t I?

And today’s Ab workout:

Planks (feet on ball) 3×120 seconds.
Hanging Leg Raise 3×10
Horizontal Woodchop 1×12x2 plate
Woodchop (high pulley) 2×12x2 - need to go heavier next time.
Jack Knife 2×12

I’m thinking it would be better to combine abs with upper. I dunno. Was going to yesterday but it was getting late. I should really have time for both though. The GBC sets should only be taking me maybe 20 minutes, plus 10 for negs plus 10-15 for more chest stuff. OK, next time I’ll focus on getting abs in with upper. Eh, never mind. UD 2 workout has already been written for me.

OHHH and I did Arc today. 20 minutes. Woulda gone longer but I had to tan. AND my knee didn’t complain once today. Not once. I’m psyched. Still gonna rest it but I’m really happy. My glutes need to be slapped around a bit lot. Can’t do that if my knees are being bratty and are in a time out!

I went to see the Doc yesterday about my bitchy knee. I saw a new Doc in the practice. She asked me how I lost the weight. I just laughed at her and said, “How do you think I did it?”

So, she just looks at my knee, just looks at it and says, “You have patellar tendonitis.” Hmm, well OK it feels like that, is probably that; but I don’t know how she knew by
just looking at it. So I made her touch it, just to make me feel better.

And that was it. Oh, and “Don’t do whatever makes it hurt.”

So, basically, I’m left treating myself. I know my hamstrings and calfs (or is it calves?) are super duper tight. I know my quads look like shit, and they shouldn’t given all the lower body work and running and arc training I do, so I assume underactive. I know for a fact my glutes don’t work. When I was doing kickbacks I was holding at the top and could not even feel the glutes flexing. I don’t know. I can’t seem to get them to kick in. It takes more concentration and maybe strength? than I seem to have. So I guess I shouldn’t even bother trying this:

So, bad knees means limited lower body work. How bad does that suck? Bad. Very bad. Very very very bad!!!! No squats? No lunges? No step ups? No, no, no, no!!!!!!!! You know what else this means? No cardio. Yes! Yes!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!! :)Actually, despite how much I hate cardio, I still need to do it. So, not having anything in my gym for cardio that doesn’t involve too much knee stress makes things a bit difficult. Even more difficult if I’m going to try UD 2.0.

I tried going low carb from Monday - Tuesday dinner. I did it sorta kinda. Not low low carb. More like moderate low carb. I’m usually around 45%. I was at 32% Monday. Including cheat - pizza and brownie sundae (no sugar ice cream) I was still only 46% Tuesday. 3000ish calories but hey who’s counting? Oh yeah, I am!

By Tuesday afternoon I was bitchy and light headed. I need to stay out of the gym when I’m bitchy and lightheaded. I had a super crappy workout out. Went something like this:

Wait 15 minutes for three guys to get done doing their cable crossovers. I was not even going to attempt doing any lower body without getting my activation work in first. No way, no how.

I didn’t know they were 3 teaming. I asked one kid if he was using the pulley he said he was and “It’ll be quick. Only doing 3 sets.” He must be an English major. 3×3 does not equal 3.

I am sooooooooooooooooooo, sooooo, sooooo sick of guys, it’s always the boys, taking over the cables for sometimes 30 minutes at a time (literally) to do crossovers. I mean come on, there are other people who would like to use the equipment. Get some damn dumb bells and a bench!!!!!!!! I betcha if the cables weren’t two feet from the mirror I’d get to use them any time I wanted. Spending too much time in the gym makes me wonder why I like men at all.

OK so I do my stupid useless girly barbie weight why are you doing that activation stuff. I was probably there maybe 6 minutes? After about 4 minutes I’ve got ‘em circling me, closing in, ready to pounce as soon as I bend over to remove the strap.

Then I try to set up for my GBC shitty can’t use my knees workout. I didn’t have a plan going in because I didn’t have time between Dr and gym to work it out. And I’m not real creative on the fly. I’m not real creative period. So, I try some leg presses. They don’t hurt. OK I’ll do those for my 12rep exercise.

Straight Leg Dead Lift 6×105 - coulda gone heavier but I tried 145 and that was to much so, I gotta find a number in between. I was just sick of loading the bar. Plus my knee starts bitching when I squat too low (no rack in my “gym”) which I sorta have to do to load the bar. God. I feel like a cripple!

Leg Press - 12×140 - felt these nicely in the quads! Yay!!

BW Squat for 25. 2nd set I got in 12 before the shin started aching. Dunno why I thought these were a good idea given I can’t even squat to load the bar. I blame in on the low carb thing. I really was ditzy.

After first full set, kid comes over and asks me if I’m using the leg press. I told him I was super setting but that he could work in. I do one quick set, out of order just to get it in and give him time - and I guess because I kinda had a feeling what happened next would happen. Seemingly nice kid, a friend (oops stupid me, gotta double/triple/yeah even sometimes quadruple team every piece of equipment in my gym is the law apparently), proceed to park their asses there for oh I dunno, 15 minutes. Apparently they don’t know what work in means.

Fuck!

Fine. I can’t squat, now I cant leg press, so I might as well just screw this and move on to the next superset.

3x for all:

Ham Curl - 6×80
Back Ext - 12×30
Bridge - 1×25 on bench, 2×25 ball. I think I should stick to the bench. Ball seems to involve more hamstring than I probably need.

Oh and I did an ab workout Monday. Same as the previous. Well, no,

Planks 3×120 sec - these totally totally SUCK without an mp3 player.
Ball Crunch 3×12x15
Horizontal Woodchop 2×12x2 - I don’t know what these plates weigh. I’m thinking they’re 5lbs
Lateral Flex because of course I can’t use the pulley but hey I got in two sets so I should be ecstatic right? 1×12x20

And 30 minutes on the Arc with no music. That was the longest hardest 30 minutes of my life.