Deconstructing the Meme

This is pretty amazing stuff. I’m trying to wrap my brain around what this means in terms of subconscious thought, self image, even reality. What is real? How do we know what is “real” even exists?

I’m one of those anal food journaler types. It started way back when I did Weight Watchers for the first, OK well, probably 5th time, first time I stuck with it to the end.

So, I still have my food journals from when I started losing weight what is now less than a month away from 2 years ago! I started Weight Watchers on March 6, 2006. When I switched to doing South Beach in June of 2006, I simply wrote food down in a notebook or occasionally tracked in the online version of Fit Day.

So, who cares about my anal food journaling tendencies? Probably no one but me. Here’s why:

I’ve been able to do some calculating to determine my approximate metabolic rate and it’s fluctuation over the past two years. I can illustrate just how detrimental to my weight loss low calorie dieting has been.

I wanted to make pretty graphs and detail how I did some calculations but I don’t have the patience for that right now. Here’s what the numbers look like:

Weight Watchers
87 Days
Average Calories: 1360
Exercise: 40 minutes cardio 4-5 days a week
Fat Loss: 13.26 lbs = 533 average daily fat burn calories
Average Daily Metabolic Rate for Maintenance: 1893
Average Weekly Fat Loss: 1.06 lbs
Scale Weight Loss: 19.6 lbs
Lean Body Mass: -6.34 although I suspect much of this number to have been fluid loss a result of having to give up my typical lunch, dinner and desert - Hostess Cupcakes.

I should say here that I actually stopped losing on Weight Watchers after 67 days. This is important to know given what happens next:

South Beach Diet - I didn’t do this properly. I ate grains maybe 3x a week on average.
386 Days
Average Calories: 1325
Exercise: 40-90 minutes cardio, 20 minutes light resistance 4-5 days a week.
Fat Loss: 32.29 lbs = 292 average daily fat burn calories
Average Daily Metabolic Rate for Maintenance: 1617
Average Weekly Fat Loss: .58 lbs
Scale Weight Loss: 26.5 lbs
Lean Body Mass: +5.79 - I assume this is just a regain of the fluid loss during Weight Watchers. I wasn’t eating enough to gain LBM! Then again, any day over 1617 calories, which I certainly would have had on occasion (I’m not perfect), I could have gained.

So after going low low cal on Weight Watchers and getting stuck, I switched to South Beach. I never lost the whatever 7-10lbs they promise in the first 2 weeks. I think I lost 4 or 5, and then of course, because I’d sent my metabolic rate to hell, I got stuck again for about 5 months. I lost the same 2 lbs for 5 months. I have no idea how or why I kept going!

So, totals for the low calorie, dirty (not clean like the plan I follow now) diet:
473 Days
Average Daily Calories: 1343
Fat Loss: 45.55 lbs: = 337 average daily fat burn calories
Average Daily Metabolic Rate for Maintenance: 1680

Also note that metabolic rate INCLUDES exercise. Here are the numbers, or what would be my approximate basal metabolic rate based on the Harris Benedict formula:

Weight Watchers: 1551
South Beach: 1155

Here’s what my BMR should have been based on the same formula and my average weight for the respective time frames:

Weight Watchers: 1654 - so to start I’m close to what I should have been
South Beach: 1549 - that’s 394 less calories burned at rest per day. Here’s how that adds up over the 386 days:

394 calories x 386 days = 15,2084 calories / 3500 calories per pound = 43.45 pounds I could have lost but didn’t because I wasn’t eating enough.

Thanks to long term low calorie, not even super low starvation level calories, but the calorie range most women think they should eat to lose weight in, 1200-1400 calories, I actually succeeded in slowing down my weight loss by over 50%! Why the hell would anyone want to starve themselves fat? Maybe because they don’t realize they’re doing it?

If you are one of those people that hates to journal, you may want to reconsider. At least know for sure what you are consuming and what you are expending. I use Diet Power to track my nutrition and exercise. Try it free for 15 days.

I don’t see how this fat loss thing can be done, long term, any other way. We have to know how our bodies are responding to what we are doing. How can we know if what we are doing is working, or not, if we don’t know what we are doing in the first place??

Check back tomorrow for what happened in September ‘07 after a few days of being sick and not caring about what I put into my body. Look at my BMR and well, anyone who can tell me what happened gets a gold star.

I fell asleep with the TV on last night. When I woke up there was some hot minister guy in jeans, quoting cool R&B lyrics, talking about how to pray. I like to watch these guys sometimes. He was hot, so I watched. After the sermon, or whatever it is they call it, they go to an audience member who talked about how he’d lost 70 pounds after taking part in some program offered by the hot minister dude. Then comes the sales pitch….

The viewer is told that in return for a gift of $30 or more, they would receive the complete sermon/program on DVD, a cookbook, and a creative exercise DVD.

That’s how my day started. With a laugh.

A while later I come up here to my computer and on the front page of Yahoo is a link to an article about weight loss, I forget what the hook line was. So, like the idiot I am, I click on said link to find an article by a woman who claims to have invented spinning. Maybe she did? I wouldn’t know. Here’s something she said:

Our bodies are built to survive, so when you exercise for long periods of time (often and consistently) your body thinks it needs to hold on to fat for energy.

Yeah, that make sense. Most marathon runners are like really fat, right? So we shouldn’t exercise too much if we want to keep fat off. Maybe I should just go sit on the couch?

Oh wait, no, no couch potato for me today. She does say we need to do resistance training. Hmm….does she want me to lift weights?

Nope.

Nobody wants to exercise more - and we don’t want to train our bodies to need more exercise to stay fit. So exercise efficiently – two short, very intense (relative to your level of fitness) training sessions weekly, like a 15-minute fast run/walk or fast cycling sprint intervals, and two moderately long, moderately intense sessions (30-45 minutes) of strong walking, cycling, or yoga, with one long day (60-90 minutes) of a moderately paced walk/hike. That’s a great five-day/week training schedule.

4. Instead of adding more days to your workout schedule, add a weighted vest to your training. I have said this before, but this is the most efficient way that I know of to build muscle while burning calories. For more information, go to (I will not link big fat lies from my blog)

So, she’s selling a weighted vest I am supposed to wear while I walk. It comes with eight half pound weights - so, according to my bad math, yes, I had to use a calculator, that’s four pounds. Here’s what the website states will be accomplished with four pounds:

Walk in the comfortable (insert name of big fat lie here) and see dramatic changes in your body quickly.

• Lose Weight
• Build Bone Density
• Sculpt and Tone
• Increase Cardiovascular Strength
• Reduce Stress and Anxiety

The sickest part is that there was over 1100 comments from readers, the vast majority agreeing with the article, saying that it was exactly what they were doing; they are exercising less and it is working.

OK. Whatever.

When we consistently expend significantly more energy than we take in our metabolic rate slows - whether we are exercising or not.

If you exercise less without altering calorie intake and you lose weight faster without exercise, you were likely not eating enough calories to sustain the activity level. In effect, (not actuality) your body will react to the continued calorie deficit created by exercise as starvation - the same way it would if you stopped eating!

Or, it could be that if you’ve increased intensity but decreased overall time while keeping calories the same, you probably weren’t working out hard enough to create an energy deficit.

If you’ve read this far you’re probably wondering where “Fast Weight Loss Tip #1″ is aren’t you? I already gave it to you.

Pray. Pray for a miracle.

Here’s what no one selling fast weight loss solutions will ever tell you because if they did you wouldn’t buy their product:

There is no fast/easy way to shed fat. It takes time, effort, patience, loads and loads of patience, and sources of unbiased information. Most of those are things you can’t buy but you can certainly pray for.

Spending some time in quiet meditation praying will at the very least reduce stress levels which reduces cortisol and adrenaline, which in turn can sometimes enhance fat loss. And, as those of us trying to shed fat know, especially after the scale hasn’t moved for days or weeks on end, fat loss can certainly feel like a miracle.

Mom sent me this today. I’m not sure if it’s funny or not. OK well, yeah, it is funny! I think though, that it would be funnier if it weren’t true for so many people.

FWIW, if you feel like this after starting a workout program, you’re working too hard and you need to back off.

Dear Diary,

For my birthday this week, my daughter (the dear) bought personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

MONDAY:
Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well
worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring! Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already sore from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!

TUESDAY:
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda’s rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT!! It’s a whole new life for me.

WEDNESDAY:
The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn’t try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.
Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members; her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the Hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other crap too.

THURSDAY:
Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn’t help being a half an hour late, it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. She sent another skinny twit to find me. Then, as punishment, she put me on the rowing machine — which I sank.

FRIDAY:
I hate that twit Belinda more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little cheerleader. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it. Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don’t have any triceps! And if you don’t want dents in the floor, don’t hand me the darned barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.

The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn’t it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

SATURDAY:
Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my day planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of The Weather Channel.

I’m having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my daughter will choose a gift for me that is fun — like a root canal or a hysterectomy.

I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!